Back to School
Well, it’s almost the time to start shopping for back to school supplies and for separated parents, this can sometimes be a point of contention. If your children are residing equally with both parents, and child support is being paid on an offset basis (meaning each parent is paying the other parent child support in accordance with their income, such that the higher income parent is paying the difference), day to day expenses are to be shared. In shared parenting, parents are supposed to be providing shelter, food and clothing for the children equally. This means both parents should be making sure outgrown regular clothing is replaced.
However, there are things that do not need to be duplicated: children do not need two backpacks, two lunch bags, two snowsuits, two sets of gym shoes or two laptops, for example.
For items that are not to be replicated in both households, parents should share these expenses. Some judges will order them to be paid proportionate to income and some will order them to be paid equally.
Then, of course, there is the issue of the one parent who buys designer clothing and another who is shopping at Costco.
How to resolve this issue practically, without making it a huge legal issue? I offer you three possible resolutions:
- Alternate years – one year you buy the supplies, the next year your ex buys the supplies.
- Set a budget – agree on a maximum budget, one parent buys the supplies and the other parent reimburses 50% of the costs.
- Divide and conquer – make a list of everything that is required, agree on who is getting what before shopping and reconcile the expenses at the end of September.
Of course, if your Separation Agreement details how to handle non-duplicating expenses, follow it!
No matter what, try and make your child’s back to school experience stress free by avoiding petty arguments. Remind yourself, and your ex, that the most important thing is that your children’s needs are never presented as a burden or hassle. Make back to school shopping as enjoyable and stress free with clear communication about who is buying what, and who is paying for it.
